Todays plan for survival was really simple enough, but still some things seems impossible to do..
1. Wake up (check)
2. Stay awake (check)
3. SmokeRøyk (check x 2)
4. Make a bowl with oatmeal (check)
5. Shower (check)
6. Put on some make up, and feel kind of alive. (check, but I still feel apathetic)
7. Clean the refrigerator
8. Vacuum the apartment
9. Wash some clothes
10. Breathe with my stomach when things feel difficult to handle.
I feel that I’ve managed to do something on my list of things to do for today. But the last few points seems prohibitive. I just want to stay here, in my bed, in my bedroom. With the lights off and my laptop in front of me. But I have duties. Even though nobody expects me to clean the refrigerator, or clothes, or vacuum. But I know that my roomie expects me to have done something while she was at work all day.
Expectations, duties and demands etc.. They actually suck..